If you would only listen…

Have you ever given someone advice they didn't listen to or instructions on how to accomplish a task they simply chose to ignore only to later watch them become frustrated because things didn't turn out as expected?

A short while back as I listened to a loved one tell me about a situation they were experiencing and the associated frustrations, I thought to myself, “If you would only listen to me.”

Usually when we give advice it’s because we consider ourselves knowledgeable on the subject. This is typically a result of prior experience in the area. Although sometimes it’s simply because we think we know everything and others should just listen to us. (This is never me of course.)

In this particular case, I considered myself better versed on the topic. I felt I had something beneficial to offer. I felt like I could see aspects of the situation that were not so obvious to them. I wanted to avoid continual negative results for this person I cared about. But I knew they’d have none of it.

I thought: “If you would just listen to me, things could be so much easier for you.”

As I thought about that another thought came to mind:

“I bet this is what God thinks about me ALL THE TIME!”

I, myself, am guilty far too often of trying to do things my way. When I do, rarely do these things result the way I “planned.”

This really made me reflect and come to the following realization; GOD KNOWS WHAT HE’S DOING!

He really does.

If He wants me to trust him, it’s because he has it worked out. He sees things that I don’t see. He has experience that I don’t have. He knows things that I don’t know.

If I would only LISTEN.

If I would only TRUST and OBEY, my life would be a lot less difficult.

I’d probably be a lot happier as well.

How much pain, how much frustration, how much failure, how much sadness, how much grief, how much confusion could I have avoided?

How much time could I have saved?

How much more peace and happiness could I have experienced?

If I would just listen.

Now, if I can just remember this for the future…

Redefined.

2012 for me was a year of learning…

About myself. About others. About my creator. 

Discovering. Defining. Rediscovering. Redefining.

It was a year of admitting.

Admitting to myself more than anyone else.

That I wasn't things that I thought I was.

That I was things that I didn't want to be. 

Coming to terms with all my imperfections.

Accepting my humanity.

Perhaps it was a year of letting people down. 

Of disappointing. 

Pushing people away.

Isolation. 

Of trying things my way.

It had amazing, incredible moments.

But also a lot of sadness and loneliness.

I wouldn't, however, change any of it. Especially those low points. 
All of it was necessary.

It was all a relevant part of my process. 

Although so many things changed throughout the year,

I learned there was one stable part of my life.

One thing I could always rely on:

God.

No matter how much I changed, how much the things around me changed.

He stayed the same.

In the moments when I would've understood if He turned away

Or even expected Him to leave, 

Not only did His love for me remain unaffected & unaltered,

He proved to be faithful, even when I wasn't.

I disconnected myself from others.

(I’m thankful for those who love me enough to push their way in.)

I disconnected myself from God.

I had a glimpse of what life is like without Him.

I realized that I NEVER want that life!

I learned that:

I can't be me without the thing, The One who defines me.

I can't serve my purpose without the one who designed me.

I can't know myself without knowing my creator.

I learned that the thing I was looking for was there all along.

And not only was it there, it was pursuing me.

I am rediscovering Him. Falling for Him again.

And in that process, finding myself.

I have high expectations for 2013. 

But I'm not about to just sit back and wait for awesome things to happen.

I don't want to do things my way this year.

I want to be a part of what God is doing.

I NEED to be.

Wherever He is, that's where I want to be.

This month I've started the journey. I know it won’t be a smooth ride for its entire duration but it can only lead somewhere great!